When your kid gets dragged into drama 

There is nothing that annoys me the most than drama-prone people. I really don’t care for any drama, I’ve always avoided drama and I’m not interested in raising a drama-king kid either. I mean, I remember pulling a drama-queen stunt on my mom once, but it didn’t last more than 5 minutes. I was young, maybe early elementary school, I got mad about something, I threatened with leaving, so my mom opened the door for me to leave, and then I backtracked and said: “do you want dad to come home and ask where’s my baby girl, realize I’m gone, and have him cry tears of sadness?!?” My mom still laughs every time she tells me about my drama-queen episode, but it’s the only one I can remember having.

 

Anyways, fast forward almost 40 years of surfing drama waters, and my kid gets dragged into unwanted drama. Last Thursday I’m dropping off my son at school, we waited in the cafeteria for the time to go to his classroom. I have my kid on my lap, we’re praying for our day to be a good one, when we’re interrupted by two former classmates of my kid.

 

These two girls, M and C, proceed to tell me that my kid punched M twice in the belly. When they told me this, it seemed as if they were telling me they had pancakes for breakfast with syrup. ‘Where did he punched you’, I asked. M pointed at her belly. ‘Two times’, she said. I looked at my kid saw the fear and the tears coming out of his eyes, and he said: “mama, I didn’t do that mama! I didn’t do that!” I held him as tight as I could, told the girls I’d take care of it. They didn’t even blink. They said “ok”, and off they went.

 

My kid was livid he had been accused of something he didn’t do, he said he would never touch or hit a girl because that was ‘illegal’. “Mama, I would never do that, that’s wrong mama!”. “I know baby boy, I know you wouldn’t hurt anybody.” I grabbed his hand and went over to the office to find the vice principal. I told her what had just happened, what we were told, she asked who the girls were. She asked Sam about it, kid told her what he told me. I know my kid isn’t perfect, but I knew in my gut and in my heart he didn’t do this at all. I told the vice principal it was odd that one, they told me and not a teacher. Two, that they were completely emotionless about it. Three, if it was true, they would’ve been absolutely upset about it. These are second grade girls we’re talking about. I asked his teacher if the kids spent time together at all, if she knew anything about it. We both agreed the whole thing sounded fishy and shady. They don’t even play outside or at recess or at the cafeteria at the same time. They’re not in daycare together either. So it was very suspicious. She said it was an awful situation since the kid has been doing awesome since school started!

 

See, my kid didn’t have the greatest kindergarten year. We both really don’t care for his K teacher. I mean, no offense, but I really don’t care about her. Her ways in regards to my son were just not constructive at all. He’s been in daycare since he was one year-old. He knows the rules, he’s an active kid, but I never got daily notes from a teacher until he started Kindergarten. There were a couple of kids in his class that didn’t help him either, but she wouldn’t let him off the hook.

 

There were other things that I think didn’t help him. I was working nights, didn’t have the greatest patience because I wasn’t sleeping much, but I was there for him for everything he needed, sleepy or not. He acted out of course, but the kid, teacher, vice principal, daycare and everyone else knew I was on it. Then we went off to first grade. Night and day! His first grade teacher was exactly what we needed! She was awesome even when he had trouble again with a couple of trouble-making boys that were with him in Kindergarten. Kid’s a talker like his mama (and his grandmothers on both sides…) and an active kid as well, so for him it was a struggle to stay put, but he pulled it off. He got good grades, I was on it every single day, working with the teacher to bring the best out of him.

 

As if school wasn’t enough, daycare was another place for Sam to deal with a couple girl bullies there too, Z and A. It was like “Really? The kid wants to behave! Leave him alone!”, but I guess that’s why they wouldn’t leave him alone. They even teased him for not having a dad. Really? It was ironic since one of those girls doesn’t have a dad either! Once I went to pick him up, those two girl bullies approached me and one said my kid had drawn her up with funny faces. The other one said she wanted to tell me about it too. I asked Sam about it, he said he was just drawing and they wouldn’t leave him alone. Well, I asked them: “did you bleed?” they said no; “did you die?”, they said no; “do you have any broken bones?”, they said no again. Then I pointed them both away, thinking “get the hell out of my sight!”. I grabbed my kid, told the teacher and the director what I had done. Couldn’t help myself. Why are these 2 bugging my kid and complaining about stupid stuff? Anyways, drama continued. The girls cried their eyes out, told their parents, you know the drill. The worse part, both girls kept bugging my kid, saying I was the one who was getting in trouble! Wow, that was interesting…

 

I had a conversation with my kid about how sometimes parents do not talk to their kids about their attitude and don’t stop them from bugging others. Those parents also let them think it’s everybody else’s fault but theirs when whatever happens. I think those are mean and abusive kids in the making. I told my kid that’s why I call him on his attitude, why I hold him accountable of his actions, which is why I stop him on his tracks when he’s mean or rude and ask him to apologize for his behavior. I actually hung my kid by his toes when another very sweet and very shy little boy told me Sam had been mean to him. I asked Sam what happened, said the kid was being annoying and told him to go away. I asked Sam how he felt every time he wanted to play with someone and he was told to get lost. Sam said he didn’t like it and it made him feel sad. So I told him to stop being mean with others and to play with whoever wanted to play with him, and to apologize to this shy kid. I don’t put up with that kind of behavior in my kid or any kid.

 

Anyways, so back to last week. The cafeteria thing happened Thursday morning. Friday morning the vice principal said the girls were scheduled to come to her office and have a talk with her. Later that day I went to pick my kid up from daycare. I asked if anything happened about the whole scandal. This is what he said: “the vice principal said the girls meant another boy did it, but Z and A kept asking me why I punched M and bugging me about it at daycare even when I told them M made a mistake and that I wasn’t me!” Really? So now the drama spilled over at daycare. The perpetrator is actually at daycare, the bully girls got a whiff of the whole thing and started bugging him about it. Of course I called daycare and told them about the situation, and I talked to the vice principal about it this morning.

 

No, it’s not alright when someone drags your kid into a situation he didn’t even know existed. No, it’s not alright when it gets spread out and your kid’s reputation is smeared. No, it’s not alright that girls go and directly approached another parent to complain about their kid. I want them to apologize to my kid for dragging him into something he didn’t even do. I used to like all those girls. I told my kid to stay away from those crazy butt girls. I told him even when he may not start anything, kids can be crazy and will spread lies faster than fire, so it was best to stay away from them, as in run away for your life! This is second grade for goodness sake! High school drama in second grade!!

 

My kid has been doing great this year! He doesn’t deserve this drama! His behavior has been nothing but awesome at both school and daycare, he’s doing his homework every day, he’s doing great at karate and at sports. I’m beyond proud of my kid! His teachers are proud of him as well! Seriously, this kind of drama is such a drag! Parents should teach their kids not to be a pest to others. I don’t put up with any crap from my kid and he better not start any drama here or at school or daycare. He knows better! He also knows I have his back. He’s seen it more than once. He knows I’m a mean and mad mama bear when it’s needed.

 

Anyways, teaching my kid to do and say the right thing is what’s important in my book. We pray for him to do so every morning. I pray for God to grant me wisdom to raise this kid His way every single day. I want my kid to serve God and his country one day, and to be an outstanding man and citizen of this amazing country. I think I’m doing a good job so far considering I’m a widow single mom. So I’m getting prepared to help my kid to stand up for himself with all the confidence in the world. Martial arts helps, but it’s really up to a mama bear to help her cub grow up strong and confident, and this mama bear is gearing up!

 

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